Doesn't everyone have a love/hate relationship with something in their life? Maybe it is where you live, your job, exercising or whatever. I have such a relationship with cooking, only I would characterize it more as a tolerate/hate relationship. I'm probably an average cook. Most of the recipes I make turn out and are at the very least edible. However, after 8 years of cooking for kids who basically have to be forced to eat what I've labored to make, and at times prefer to go to bed hungry than eat it, it should come as no surprise that I have developed a low cooking self esteem. Adam tells me everything is good, but then again he would eat burned toast and tell me it was fabulous so he lost his cooking complement credibility long ago. Jenna is the ring leader and refuses to try anything. We've tried every parenting strategy in the book to help her get over her extremely picky eating, but are still battling it out on a daily basis. Frankly I'm tired of making the same lame meals that she will actually eat. Not only that but I've gotten so paranoid about cooking for other people that whenever people come and stay at our house Adam does most of the cooking while they are here. I also have anxiety when I'm asked to take a meal to another family and have to tell myself over and over that I'm not a terrible cook and its ok to make food for other people. I'm in a dinner group with some friends and have been stressing about hosting for over 6 months now. Yup, it is a classic case of low cooking self esteem.
Ok, so what prompted this latest rant? We are in the middle of the winter and I've got my usual case of the winter blahs. Happens every year. Well, last night I spent a significant amount of time making chicken enchiladas for dinner. In the past the kids liked them, but last night they each had about a TBSP of rice a few green beans and just pushed everything else around their plate. If I hadn't of spent so much time making them perhaps I wouldn't have gotten upset, but since I wasn't in the mood to make them in the first place I was a little miffed. Uncharacteristically Adam wasn't at home so after telling the kids they needed to eat a few times and getting only blank stares I got up and texted Adam a simple message, "I'm never cooking again." and then spent the rest of the night in my "Mom office" pouting. Yeah, I'm really mature sometimes. Not too long after Adam returned and assessed the situation he had the kids running in and hugging me while thanking me for every meal I've ever made during their lifetime. It was definitely one of those "I've had it!" moments. Is it alright to blame it on the winter blahs?
I'm pretty sure I"ll regret writing this when I'm finally in my right mind again.
10 comments:
It's always nice to know that people are human! And it's always nice to have something to blame it on. Darned Winter Blahs!
I keep reminding myself that I just have to do the best I can. And some days that's pretty crappy, but some days that is really awesome. At least I'm doing the best I can.
I also have a rule (easier said than done), that you can't get offended by children. They so rarely mean to offend, even when they say offensive things. I think that rule probably should apply to adults too, but I'm not that charitable.
I love you! Hope tomorrow is pizza and smiles for everyone!
You're human? Holy cow, I feel better.
Sorry about what happened, but man I feel better.
Been there. Done that. (except for the texting thing. That, I haven't done.)
I had a bit of breakdown of my own this week. Ugh, late January.
One day, when your kids are raising kids, you'll be super glad you included some of the nitty gritty mommy moments.
Hillary, you are awesome! I know, I should not think hearing you post this is awesome, but you are. Kids are kids and my personal opinion is that a child's taste buds should go numb at about 2 years of age, then slowly start to come back around 6 years of age. Seriously, think about it! My Peter and William will eat anything when they are under 2. But after that 2nd birthday something happens in their brain and they reject so much stuff. Don't get too down on yourself for writing your post, sometimes we all just need to vent. Good luck with your next meal, don't give up. Maybe you are just in a recipe rut, you just need new ones to try. _diedre Gray
I have cooking LSE too. All of the compassionate service meals that come from this house are prepared by Nate and he does most of the cooking when we have family or friends over (I can handle the small stuff like frozen corn).
The good news is that I never feel bad if the kids don't like what I make. Our rule is that they can have what we are eating or eat 2 pieces of bread (no butter, no jam). Emily went through a phase where she was eating bread for dinner one or two nights a week. :)
Tonight I made a huge pot of my favorite soup even though I knew the kids wouldn't like it and Aaron is out of town. I wanted the leftovers for myself. They all complained and ate the 'side' of applesauce and a piece of bread. Shows what kind of Mom I am! I feel your pain on this topic big time...
For the record, I don't really feel bad that they don't like what I make, I'm just bitter that I have to keep making it. Does that make sense?
Hey, if I lived closer I would have come over and helped you eat your chicken enchiladas! I think those are yummy and I am sure they were tasty! regardless of what your kids said.
I don't love to cook either and frankly, I am not all that good at it. I have a few party dishes that I always make when we entertain, but that is about it. I think Shawn is very tired of my lack of enthusiasm in the kitchen. Every now and then I really go all out, and gosh darnit, he had better be REALLY impressed.
You should feed your family sugarless, tastless, totally healthy food for a few months and then everything will seem so yummy. I think that worked at our house.
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