Life Moves On

Life continues to move at an astonishing speed around here so I'll attempt to write about all of the other stuff that has gone on in the last month or so.

This is Jameson's first year of rec soccer.  We've had some really cold games and a few warm ones. It's all starting to click for him and he has scored at least 2 goals in the last few games.

We were going to all go to St. George for spring break, but then we received word that Britton had 2 soccer games and regular practices every day during the break so I stayed home with Britton and Adam took the rest of the kids down for some fun in the sun with Gramma and Grampa.

About 30 minutes before Adam and the kids left town on April 5th we received the unexpected phone call from West Sands telling us that we had a court date in Ethiopia on April 20th!  The next 3 days were busy as I ran around town trying to get ready to travel and bring AJ home.

My dear friends from high school Emily and Christy came to visit me a few days before we left for Ethiopia.  It has been way too long since we have seen each other so it was great to visit with them for a few hours.

Korinne also played in the orchestra during a school assembly the Friday before we left.

Saying goodbye the night of April 15th was hard because we were planning to be gone for about 3 weeks and I have never been away from the kids that long.

On Easter Adam and I were on an airplane, and Grandma was dying eggs with the kids at home after church.

And we were able to skype with the kids when we met AJ our first day in Ethiopia.

 Britton and Jenna played a beautiful duet of "Heavenly Father Loves Me" during Sacrament meeting on April 23rd. Grandma reported that it was so beautiful it brought some people to tears.

Britton had a few soccer games while we were gone.

And Jameson loved his new stuffed animal from Grandma.

We ended up returning from Ethiopia in time to see Jenna's ballroom dance end of year show at the Ellen Eccles theater.

 I watched Britton be inducted into the National Honor Society this week at the high school while Adam attended one of Jameson's soccer games.  In May we always seem to have a lot of "divide and conquer" nights.

Britton is in the middle of the back row

On Thursday we first went to Korinne's orchestra concert. . .

Korinne is 2nd to left in back row

. . .and then ran to the middle school to see Jenna perform in the drama club play they wrote and worked on all school year long.

Jenna was very convincing as the "evil queen." She stayed after school on Tuesdays and Thursdays throughout the school year for drama club. She liked it so much she has decided she wants to be in the drama club at the high school next year.

On Friday night we headed to Rexburg to witness the baptism of my sister Heather's youngest child, Quinn, on Saturday morning.

Then we toured the Idaho Falls Temple before it is rededicated next month.

Britton was thrilled that Ridgeline won the 3A State Soccer Championship this weekend.  Go Riverhawks!! Britton didn't play Varsity this year, but he worked out with these guys day in and day out and was a part of the JV team.

 Our next door neighbor, T.J. is #13 in this picture and has made my life SO much easier this soccer season.  He is a senior and brought Britton home from soccer practice every day and also drove him to all things soccer related.  He and his brother Quinn drive Britton to school every morning so we don't have to. What great neighbors. 😊

Ethiopia Part 4

On Tuesday, April 25th, Adam and I left early for Adama with Semmy, only this time we were going to pick up AJ for good.  Because it was going to take 4-5 hours for the entire trip we left before we got the required signature from MOWA in an effort to keep all 3 families on the same time schedule. We were confident MOWA had received written confirmation of the verbal order already given and the papers would be signed while we were in Adama and then all 3 families would be available to go to immigration that afternoon and apply for the kids' passports.

Seeing this herd of camel walking down the road was a quick reminder that we weren't in the US anymore.

AJ came into the office holding the hands of 2 of his friends at the orphanage. He is in the middle.

During our visit I went out and sat on the curb in the shade and AJ came and made sure he was sitting right beside me.

We played with AJ for a little bit while Semmy took care of the required paperwork and just as we were getting ready to leave we took pictures with a few of the nannies that were on hand.

 I found it so strange that we were going to take him from everything he had ever known without any sort of warning or fanfare.  With a quick wave to anyone who happened to be standing around we climbed into the back of Semmy's car with AJ on my lap and left the orphanage.  That was it, his life was going to be different and he had no idea what was going on.  At first he just fell asleep but when he woke up about half way back to Addis Ababa he just quietly looked out the window with a quizzical expression on his face and snuggled up to me.This was definitely a new experience for him.

Our first clue that things were not going as planned was when we got back to the hotel and the other families did not have their kids with them. Oh no, I thought, this isn't good.  They were going to pick up their kids in Addis as soon as the papers were signed so if they don't have their kids than the papers haven't been signed. It was decided that our continued presence at MOWA might be the thing to get them to actually sign like they said they would so I stayed with AJ in the hotel room while Adam went back to the MOWA office with Michael and Casey to see if they could figure out what was going on.  They came back a few hours later with more questions than answers.  The papers for the other 6 Spanish families' who were in our same boat had been signed, but MOWA didn't sign our papers and it didn't look like they had any intention of doing so. When asked point blank why they signed the Spanish families and not ours the Minister simply said that "it was a mistake".  A "mistake" in the form of a bribe, no doubt. We will never know exactly why they decided to sign for them and not for us and can speculate all day long, but it doesn't change the fact that we were now in unchartered waters.  MOWA has never refused to sign off after a legal court decree has been issued before so both West Sands and the U.S. Embassy were scrambling to try and find what the next best step might be.

We have been in constant contact with the Embassy since the suspension was announced and I must say that the team over adoptions has been fantastic.  They flew into action at the first sign of trouble and have been working very hard to advocate for all of the US citizens being affected by it.  Apparently this suspension came down as an executive order from the Prime Ministers office yet the courts were still processing adoption cases on a daily basis and more families were en route for their court dates.  Our 3 cases are considered top priority for the Embassy because we were the only ones that were finished with court BEFORE the suspension was announced, everyone else came afterward.

AJ did well at the hotel although that first day was a little rough because the nap he took in the car interfered with his afternoon nap so he was a little tired in the late afternoon.

We played with toys and watched Baby Einstein videos.  When the maids came to clean the room I took him up to the sky lobby on the floor above us to look at the view.

He did well at dinner and we got him to sleep at around 8:00 p.m. which was his normal bedtime. Once again he slept until after 8:00 a.m. the next morning.

AJ is a thumb sucker. 

We knew that Wednesday was going to be the day of decision, but now everything was more complicated for us because we had custody of AJ.  If they signed then we would be able to keep him and move forward, but if they didn't we would have no choice but to take AJ back to the orphanage and go home and wait it out.  I'm sure you can imagine our emotional wrestle.  The other families were on edge, but the difference was that they didn't have their kids with them so they weren't going to have to send them back. By this time we had had AJ for a total of 3 days and 2 nights which is long enough for him to get used to us and warm up to us. 

Once again Adam spent the morning at the MOWA office and then in the afternoon I attended a meeting at the Embassy.  It was clear by the end of the meeting with the adoption department that they were doing everything in their power to help us and were working to set up meetings with top government officials to resolve the issue, but there wasn't a timeline and I knew we couldn't just stay in Ethiopia indefinitely.  It's just too much to ask a family with 4 kids at home.

We left the Embassy at around 4 p.m. and Michael and Sarah Beth had already decided to catch the 11:10 p.m. flight out of Ethiopia that very night.  Traffic was busy so I had Michael use the one local cell phone we had with us to call Adam at the hotel and tell him to contact our travel agent (who specializes in Adoptions) so she could start looking for flights home.  We decided that spending more time with AJ would only confuse him and make it even harder for us to leave so leaving sooner rather than later would be best. I was so upset with the Ethiopian government that I remember thinking to myself as we were making our way back to the hotel, "I just want to get out of Ethiopia right now!" We booked tickets on the same flight as Michael and Sarah Beth that very night.  

Semmy arranged for AJ to stay with his family overnight and assured us that he would take a social worker with him in the morning to return him to the orphanage in Adama. After getting to the hotel we left once again with Semmy to take AJ to his home.  He is married and has 2 daughters ages 14 and 11 to help watch him and I knew AJ would be in good hands.  All day long AJ had been so sweet and loving and you could tell he was enjoying the extra love and attention that come with having a Mommy and Daddy of your very own.  I held him tightly as we drove through the streets of Addis Ababa where it was getting dark and starting to rain. Walking into Semmy's house and handing AJ over to his family without knowing when we would be back to get him was one of the hardest things Adam and I have ever done. It was awful.  I'll just leave it at that.

We had exactly 30 minutes to get packed and leave for the airport once we got home from Semmy's house.  Our adrenaline was pumping as we threw everything into suitcases making it to the lobby without a minute to spare.  We flew to Frankfurt and then from Frankfurt to Chicago with Michael and Sara Beth before we split up. They continued onto Birmingham and we went to SLC. At this point I was so ready to be home again and see the kids, it had been a long 10 days in Ethiopia. 

After 20 hours in the air we touched down on Thursday at 3:30 p.m. While it wasn't the ending we were hoping for, we have confidence in all of the many people at the Embassy and elsewhere that are working on our behalf and are sure that everything will work out in the end. Our names are being discussed in high level government meetings in both the United States and Ethiopia, which is definitely not anything I ever thought would happen.  The good news is that we were able to spent 3 days with AJ.  After 20 months of looking at his picture and not knowing anything about him, it's nice to finally know a little more about his personality and his likes and dislikes.  When he does come home we will be better prepared to receive him. 

Ethiopia Part 3

Since we knew we were going to be in town for a few more days we asked the agency if we could go back to Adama to visit AJ one more time.  Semmy picked us up early on Saturday morning and we went back to the orphanage to spend some time with him.

Looking at pictures of his new brothers and sisters.

He likes to stick his tongue out a lot.

At one point in our visit he realized that all of the kids next door were eating food so he kept trying to sneak out of the office where we were supposed to stay and run over to the other room.  I couldn't blame him, I was getting hungry, too. Fortunately I had a granola bar with me which he thought was delicious. Finally we let him go eat and he came back when he was finished.

We spent quite a bit of time with him out in the courtyard, too.  He loved the balloons we brought and loved kicking soccer balls.  We watched him line up the small bag of matchbox cars we had for him to play with.  He would put them all in a straight line and then move them into another straight line the other direction.  He is a fan of throwing toys and then running after them and picking them back up.

He liked waving to all of his friends hanging out in the next room.

After about 3 hours it was time for us to leave.  We got into the car and just when I shut the door he ran up to my door like he wanted me to open it again.  When I did open it he reached his arms out to me and I scooped him up for one last hug in the car and then put him back on the ground and he walked away.  I'm not sure if he meant anything by it, but it was such a cute thing to do.  He liked being held and hugged, but he was also 100% boy and enjoyed running around and playing.

Before driving back to Addis Ababa we had lunch at the restaurant in the same hotel we stayed the previous Tuesday night.  I didn't get a good picture of the pool area then, but since we ate at a table poolside I decided to take a few during our return visit.

We had asked our agency if it was possible for us to attend an LDS church on Sunday and were told that someone would be by to pick us up at 8:30 a.m. We had absolutely no idea where we were going, or with whom we were going, but decided to just trust that it had all been worked out.  A guy did show up for us and had arranged a taxi to take us to the church.  We had only been in the taxi for maybe 2 minutes when the driver turned town a very bumpy road that was under construction.  I thought to myself, "Where is he taking us?" Then I saw my first glimpse of the chapel.  We had absolutely no idea what to expect as we don't know much about the church in Ethiopia, but I think we were both quite surprised to find a beautiful meetinghouse surrounded by spacious grounds.  It was all enclosed with a high wall and security people at the front gate opening it for cars to come through.

There is just something about seeing this sign that makes me feel at home.

We were even more surprised to go into Sacrament meeting and find that it was all in English.  The Branch President is an American who is currently working at the US Embassy in Addis.  We didn't know if there would be missionaries in Ethiopia either, but soon discovered 2 sets of missionaries blessing and passing the sacrament.  The hymns were sung in English and the talks were given in English and translated into Amheric, or vise versa depending on what language the speaker was most comfortable speaking in.

The congregation was mostly Ethiopian, but there were some Americans, too.  We talked to the Elders after the meetings and found that while all 4 were American, 2 of the 4 had been adopted from Ethiopia as children and were now back as missionaries.  They told us that the entire country of Ethiopia had only 4 branches with 4  missionaries serving in each branch and that they were part of the Uganda mission.  The missionaries were English speaking since most of the people in Ethiopia can speak some English and the mission covers a few different countries. They also told us there are currently 4 Elders in the mission that were adopted from Ethiopia as children.  I found it interesting that with only 4 branches in all of Ethiopia we were staying at a hotel that was literally 1/4 mile from this beautiful church building.  You could have seen it from our hotel room if it weren't for the trees. 

The next morning Adam and I packed up all of our stuff before we left with everyone to sign the birth certificates.  By this time I had had a few days to adjust to the idea of taking 2 trips and was at peace with it.  I was really looking forward to getting home to my kids as I had been feeling quite homesick during the trip.  We all left in a van at 9 a.m. for our last official appointment.

The other families had also made peace with the change of plans so we were all in high spirits on Monday morning because we were flying out that night and would be able to see our other kids at home after a week of being in the country.  After a morning of sitting in offices and signing official documents we were in the lobby of the hotel planning to go out to a restaurant for lunch when Michael said, "You guys, I just got an e-mail from Megan at the Embassy! She said that they have been working together with the Spanish Embassy who has 6 families in our same position and that MOWA has agreed to sign the papers for all 9 families because we completed court before the suspension!" What?! It took me 3 days to wrap my head around the change of plans and now in an instant our previous plan was back on.  With this new information we all canceled our flights for that night and started trying to prepare ourselves to get custody of our kids the next day. We were happy, of course, but at the same time I was mentally ready to go home and now I was back to having to be in a hotel room with our new 2 year old son for another 2 weeks. I definitely needed to change my mindset yet again. Not only that but on Saturday we took all of the supplies we had brought to care for AJ out to the orphanage as a donation because we figured it would be a waste to haul it all home when there was such a need for it all. Now we would need to go to a store for diapers and wipes and formula, etc. I definitely didn't wasn't feeling completely prepared anymore, but if it was actually working out we weren't going to do anything to stop it.  This was why we came in the first place!

Instead of going out to lunch the guys all went with Semmy to the MOWA office to get the papers signed and the girls stayed back at the hotel.  Semmy was nervous to let any of us go to the office with him as it just wasn't something that was done, but since all of this was completely unprecedented he decided it was OK. While waiting back in our room I realized my options of things to do were very limited because our power adapter was packed away in the backpack Adam took with him.  The TV picked up an English channel but it was BBC news and after just a few minutes I was so over watching coverage of the election in France that I just turned it off. Without a book or anything else to do I tried to take a nap, but sleep eluded me.  Fortunately I had already made a 3 p.m. appt for a massage at the spa so about 10 min before my appointment time I decided to go out on the balcony and look at the view of Addis for a few minutes.

As I stepped onto the balcony I saw a lot of knat like bugs flying around so I decided it would be best to shut the door so that they wouldn't get into the room.  As soon as I pulled the door closed I heard a loud click and quickly realized to my absolute horror that there wasn't a handle on the outside of the door and I had just locked myself outside. A quick assessment of the situation told me I was in trouble.  It was almost 3 p.m. and was very hot and the balcony had absolutely no shade.  I didn't have my phone with me and our only room key was locked in the room so even if Adam came back he wouldn't be able to get in the room and wouldn't know why I wasn't answering the door. The worst part of all of it was that I WAS GOING TO MISS MY MASSAGE! Aggghhhhhh!  I was 8 floors up, but decided my only hope was to get the attention of a hotel employee on the ground and hope they understood enough English to help me out. I yelled for quite awhile before someone finally looked up.  I said I needed a key and gave them my room number. The guy seemed to understand and went inside the hotel, but I had no idea if he really understood and would come to the right room so I sat and stared at the inside doorknob through the glass door of our hotel room for what seemed like an eternity.  Finally the doorknob started to turn and an employee stepped tentatively into the room. When he saw me waving at him from the balcony he burst into a smile and I could tell he was trying not to laugh.  "Thank you soooo much! You saved my life!"  (A bit dramatic, but so true) After the happiness and relief wore off what I really wanted to say was, "Why don't you guys have handles on the outside of your sliding glass balcony doors!?!" Seriously, what is the purpose of that? The good news is that after all of that I was only 5 min late for my massage on the 2nd floor. 😀 Phew!

The guys came back from MOWA that night without the needed signature on our papers.  The reason given was that the Minister had only verbally told them to sign our papers, but they needed to receive it in writing before they would sign. We decided to go back in the morning because at this point we had no reason to think that they wouldn't just sign it once the Minister provided the approval in writing. We spent the night preparing to get our kids the next day and were anxious and nervous and excited all at once.  This time it was really going to happen. . .

Ethiopia Part 2

At 10:00 on Wednesday morning Semmy from our agency picked us up at the hotel and we brought AJ back to the orphanage.  Semmy had a bit of business to take care of at the orphanage so they had us go into the "office" where visiting families can meet and get to know their children while at the orphanage.  Each time we pulled up to the orphanage we had to wait outside of the gates for a good 10 min. while they cleared out the courtyard and got all of the kids inside.  I thought they might let us see and get to know other children, but they were kept away from us for the most part.

After we left the orphange Semmy asked if we were interested in seeing West Sands Primary school which was also located in Adama.  It's a school sponsored by our agency and serves the poorest of the poor in the community. These kids wouldn't get to go to school if it weren't for West Sands.  They have often solicited donations so it was cool to see where all of the money goes. 

There were 6 classrooms and the school went up to the 3rd grade.

The courtyard.

 The school administrator even took us to each of the classes and let them show us the things they are learning.

After visiting the school we headed back to Addis Ababa and checked into the Sidra International Hotel which was where we stayed for the rest of the trip. West Sands has all of their families stay at this hotel where we eat most of our meals, too.  I was happy that it was also a spa and that the 1 hr massages were only $15.00!

Room 504

It was nice to get unpacked and get some sleep since we were both still struggling with jet lag. That night we had dinner with Michael and Sarah Beth. The other family, Casey and Kellen missed their flight in Turkey and had to wait another 24 hours to get the next one. They arrived later that night.

The next morning we were dressed and ready for court at 8:30 a.m. in the lobby of the hotel. As the 6 of us climbed into the van it was as if we had all known each other our entire lives.  Our timelines on this journey were almost identical and we were each very aware of what the others had gone through to get to this point.  Casey and Kellen accepted their referral in August of 2015 like us, and Sarah Beth and Michael accepted theirs 2 months before us in June of 2015.  Not only were our referrals at the same time but we were all adopting 2 year old boys who had birthdays within 2 months of each other.

We were prepared to be at the courthouse for several hours since we had to wait for our turn with the judge.  We were even instructed to bring snacks with us, but in the end we were only at the 

courthouse for about 30 minutes total.  Each couple went into the Judge's office separately, he asked a few questions, and then signed off on the adoption making the boys legally ours under Ethiopian law.

Here we are in front of the courthouse.

Kellen and Casey, Michael and Sarah Beth, Adam and Hilary

After court Semmy took us back to the hotel so we could change clothes and then we headed up a nearby mountain to a museum, palace and well known Ethiopian Orthodox church. They had a much loved Emperor in the late 19th century that lived very humbly in order to help his people modernize the country. We were able to see the Palace where he lived and attended to the business of the country.

The Palace of Emperor Minilk and Empress Titu 1883

 The roof was amazing and was original to the structure.

The Palace was very close to this grand Ethiopian Orthodox church which is still in use today.  

Ethiopia is about 60% Christian and 40% Muslim.  We only heard the call to worship once from our hotel room, but the other families' whose rooms faced the back of the hotel heard it loud and clear every morning at 5 a.m.

The museum was really cool, but they didn't allow cameras in.  They had a lot of cool relics and clothing on display along with random things like the gold medals won by Ethiopian Olympians from the Sydney, London, and Rio Olympic games.

After the museum they gave us about 20 min to shop for a few souvenirs at some shops in a "mall". Adam and I managed to get something small for each of our kids, but I felt very rushed. The other families were excited to buy Ethiopian coffee, which apparently is the best ever if you are into coffee.  We passed, of course.

Our next stop was lunch and it was delicious. Semmy knew the perfect restaurant to take a bunch of Americans.  You could tell this wasn't his first rodeo.  By this time in the day you would have thought the 6 of us had been friends for years and had merely decided to take a vacation together. Casey and Kellen live in Atlanta, Georgia and Sarah Beth and Micheal live in Birmingham, Alabama.  They all have a great sense of humor and we really enjoyed the time we were able to spend together.

We went back to the hotel for a bit before Semmy picked us up later that night for a cultural celebration.  This was probably my favorite part of the trip.  We had a traditional Ethiopian meal and were able to hear Ethiopian music and see dancing from the different tribes of Ethiopia.  There are 83 different tribal languages spoken in Ethiopia, so they all try and learn Amheric so they can communicate with each other.  Amheric isn't spoken anywhere besides Ethiopia and to me sounds more like a Middle Eastern language than a European language.  English is also taught in the schools so most people are at least bi-lingual and a lot of times are tri-lingual if they are from the country and still have their own tribal language.

They don't use utensils when they eat traditional Ethiopian foods rather they use a spongy like bread called injera to scoop up the food. Food for an entire group is served in one communal serving tray. The key is that you aren't supposed to touch any of the food with your fingers, just with a piece of injera bread.

The dancing blew our minds away.  These boys could move!

The show was amazing and we had such a great time. On the way back to the hotel we were all in high spirits and were looking forward to going to the orphanages the next morning to pick up our kids.  After a court decree is issued it must go back to a government organization called MOWA which is the Ministry of Women and Children Affairs, and they sign off on the decree so you can then apply for an Ethiopian Passport and start the medical examinations required by the US Embassy.  If all goes well in about 2 weeks after your court date everything is in place for you to take your child home to the United States.  All 3 families were planning to stay in Ethiopia during the process which meant we would have custody of our kids in the hotel until everything was complete. 

As we exited the van Thursday night at about 9:30 p.m. Semmy said he would pick us up bright and early the next morning to go back to Adama and get AJ.  The time had finally come, and this was really happening. We were all excited as we went to our rooms to get ready for bed and check e-mails from home.  At about 10:00 p.m. Adam was reading through his e-mails and looked up at me and said, "Oh no, we just got an e-mail from West Sands.  MOWA is suspending all operations and isn't planning to sign our court decree.  They haven't given any kind of a timeline as to when they will start up again so West Sands is advising us to return to the US over the weekend and await further instructions." WHAT?!?  But Semmy just said he would pick us up in the morning! This can't be happening. We texted the other families and they confirmed that they, too had received similar e-mails.  To say that we were all stunned was an understatement. In the flash of an eye everything had changed.  

The next morning instead of riding out to Adama with Semmy we all gathered in the breakfast dining area and discussed the situation.  West Sands encouraged us to reach out to the U.S. Embassy which we did promptly. Semmy and another West Sands employee went to the court to get our actual decrees and then went to MOWA themselves to see if they could figure out what was going on. The day was spent waiting around in our hotel rooms for news so I was happy I had packed some movies to watch. It was the perfect opportunity to watch all 6 hours of the BBC version of Pride and Prejudice.  Adam worked on loans and Bishop stuff and took a nap.  Around 4:00 p.m. I heard a soft knock at our door. It was Semmy and Tizia there to inform us that MOWA told them it would be at least 40 days before they would sign.  Not the news we were hoping for but this was how it was going to be so all 3 families started looking for flights home.  We booked the same flight out on Monday night so we could sign the birth certificate on Monday morning before leaving town. We spent the rest of the day trying to wrap our heads around this new reality and let it sink in.

I'm not sure what we would have done if it hadn't of been for these other families who were right there with us.  When we were all in the "depths of despair" just talking and laughing together somehow made the situation a little more bearable.

Adam, Micahel,Sarah Beth, Casey, Kellen and Hilary

We discovered that Ethiopians are not in a hurry so you better plan on at least 2 hours for every dinner. This wasn't a problem, however, because we didn't have anywhere else we needed to be or anything else we needed to do.  When in Ethiopia. . .